When You Stand Beside The Ocean
by kellsmarie
Summary: Post AWE one shot. Elizabeth writes a  heartfelt letter to her infant son before leaving to attempt to bring Will back.


A/N: This is something really different than anything I've ever written before, so I'm not really sure what to expect. Hopefully, the people who have read my other Will/Elizabeth fic will read this, but like I said, it's different. This is Elizabeth-centric with mentions of W/E, and it's her letter to her son. I think everything else is explained in the one shot itself, so I'll leave it at that. This is written for the 100 songs challenge on at the 100songs community on livejournal. This is for my prompt #002: I Hope You Dance. Will and Elizabeth is my chosen pairing for the entire table, so if you like this, there will be plenty more one shots involving these two. If you do read, please let me know what you think. Feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to deciding what to write next. Thanks.

My dear son, William:

Right now, you are asleep in the cradle beside me, but by the time you read this yourself or someone older and wiser takes the time to read its contents to you, you will be the young man your father and I can only hope you will become. I am not usually one to write a letter to someone I love like this, but as I prepare to leave you in the care of your nurse, whom you know as your Aunt Charlotte, I feel that I must leave you with a written record of the love your father and I have for you. I am about to embark on a journey with your Uncle Jack and should the worst befall us, I want to leave you with at least one memory of myself. I know that this is not much, but I fear that there is very little I can do for you now, seeing as you are only an infant. I must make do with what I can.

I'm sure by now that you have heard the tragic story of your father's death, from a family member, myself, or your father if our preparations prove to be successful. The pain it has caused me is still too fresh to write about the event here, and I feel that it is something that you should hear from someone and not have to read about. I can tell you more than most will tell you though. Your father loved me very much, there was never a question of his devotion to the ones he loved, which ultimately led to his demise in its own way. And while we did not plan on starting a family when we did, he always loved you and he did know of your birth. Your Uncle Jack was quite squeamish when it came to hearing of your birth, even if he was not present at the time, but he did make the voyage to the Flying Dutchman himself to give your father the news, and he was overjoyed to hear that you were healthy.

I'm afraid that people will talk your entire life about the decisions your father and I made, be it our unconventional wedding at sea, the life I chose for myself, or the dealings we let ourselves be drawn into that always lead to even more dangerous predicaments. If I do not return from this journey to the ends of the earth, people will accuse me of being a bad maternal figure, but I cannot even start to express the love I have for you, my sweet baby boy. There are very few ways I can show you that in a letter, for I am finding that it is very impersonal. But I want to leave you with a few guidelines to help you achieve the happiness I want you to experience to its fullest.

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder. Even as a babe, you are always exploring whatever you can while you are not asleep. You love to lay in my arms for hours and watch the waves crash against the shore or the people bustle through the cobblestone streets below the window of the bedroom we currently share. I wish that you always possess this intense draw to discover everything. I want you to learn to love the sea in this same manner, to never fully understand the majestic quality it contains so you are forever wanting to return to its waters. I want you to feel satisfied with the things you find, get your fill when it comes to exploration. But promise me, William, that you will always keep that hunger to unearth and experience things you never even thought possible.

I never want you to take a single breath for granted, for life is a very precious thing. There will come a point in your life when you believe that you are invincible, but that is never the case. I know better than anyone else that unfortunately, life is not a sure thing, no matter what age you may be. Your father and I were newlyweds, ready to start our life together when he died, and neither of us could have predicted the event before it was at hand. And god forbid love ever leave you empty-handed, I do not want you to stop searching for the one woman who you will spend the rest of your life with. Love is the most powerful feeling of all, one that you cannot describe until you have felt it for yourself. It will hurt you, it will heal you, and it will forever change you. You must always remember that, my dear boy.

No matter how old you may be or how tall you have grown, I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean. It is a very powerful force of nature that can be the best thing that you will ever experience, or it can be the worse. You must always be careful for its depths are immeasurable and its tides are never ending. The seas are very dangerous, but you will want to uncover all they have to offer. Never feel that you are dominant over its waters, though, for it will never be so.

Whenever one door closes, I hope that one more opens for you to enter. I never want you to run out of possibilities or to find yourself empty-handed when it comes to anything. You also need to give faith a fighting chance. Your father and I were not religious people, but I do believe in a higher power. I believe that this higher power, whatever it may be, will watch over you in my absence and keep you safe while I am away. I believe that this higher power is also responsible for letting your Uncle Jack think to have your father stab the heart of Davy Jones so he would not really leave us. In the same manner, you must always give the heavens more than just a passing glance. A person can always afford to have more help granted to them.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance. Their beauty surpasses their intimidating altitudes, and their valleys will serve as a perfect place for you to play while you are still a child. They may be much taller than you, but they are not a thing to fear. There are many things in this world that will make you want to cower in the corner, do not let the majestic cliffs by the seaside be one of them. You must also remember to never settle for the path of least resistance. You must always fight for the things you love, and any worthy cause will be greatly rewarded if you do fight for its honor. Admitting defeat is easy because it is surrender in its truest form. You must never let yourself surrender to anything, you never let your ship, figuratively as well, go down without a fight. You must always go down with your vessel.

Living might mean taking chances, but I can assure you that they are all worth taking. Living in fear of the unknown is not living at all. You must experience everything you possibly can and take whatever this world offers you. I might sound too much like your Uncle Jack and his Pirate Code right now, but I do believe this to be true. Loving someone might be a mistake, but in the same way, it is worth making. Being in love will only make you a stronger person. You must love yourself before you can lover another, so I hope for you, my son, that you will never find fault in yourself. I want you to make your father and I proud, but I cannot see you doing any less. Remember to always love the people who are close to you, for you never know when they may not be there to love. Remind them that you love them as often as you can.

Don't let some hell-bent heart like your Uncle Jack leave you bitter, my sweet William. You have a heart that is big and beautiful, and you should never resent the world if you are handed a bad hand from time to time. And please, do not tell your Uncle Jack I said he did not know how to love because he also knows how to hold a grudge, especially against me. When you come close to finishing, returning to the land for good, please reconsider. Think long and hard before you decide to give up on anything, whether it be sailing the seven seas or something as small as choosing a book to read. Again, I always want you to have choices in life, and I never want you to settle for anything less than what you are capable of. I never want you to miss out on an excellent opportunity as well.

Most importantly, when you receive the choice to sit down or dance, I hope you dance. It may seem trivial to you now, but I can promise you that you will not regret it. Life is like a dance, and you don't want to be the one seated at the table who ends up wondering if he was truly happy in the end. Time is a real and constant motion that continuously rolls us along. It will not stop, so you must be the one to slow down if it is necessary. Nobody wants to look back on their youth and wonder where the years have gone. I do not want you to ever regret the choices you make in life, for none of it matters in the end if you are truly happy with your life and yourself. So, please, promise me that you will dance.

What I am trying to tell you, my dear boy, is that I want you to live life to its fullest if I am not here to live it with you. Goodbyes are hard, for you never know just how permanent a farewell is. I hope that this one is not forever, but I do not know if I will return to you. After I place this in its envelope, I will kiss you and tell you that I love you more than anything else one last time before leaving you and this letter with Charlotte. I will then depart from Port Charles in the company of your Uncle Jack to the island of Tortuga where we will be met by Captain Hector Barbossa. Together, we will work to return your father safe and sound to you. If something is to go wrong, I want you to have this, William. I want you to know that I love you and that I really did believe in the choices I made. I can only wish the same for you. I hope that I will see your beautiful face again soon. Be safe. Goodbye, my son.

With all my love,

Your mother, Elizabeth Turner


End file.
